Editor’s note: We’re looking for a variety of young voices to contribute to “Hits Different.” If you’d like to write a commentary, send it to Area Editor Jason Hennington at jason. hennington@granitemediapartners. com.
What is the best emotion?
This past Sunday, I listened to a pastor tell a story about having lunch with his sister when she asked him that same question. The pastor answered, “The best emotion is success.” His sister told him he was wrong. Seeing his confusion, she declared the correct answer was relief.
For me, the story prompted much reflection on what might be the “correct” answer.
When I heard the pastor describe the question posed by his sister, I immediately assumed the right answer would be hope. This response was purely instinctual on my part and reflected my desire to choose a “safe” option. After all, an entire spectrum of positive emotions are generated by hopefulness. There’s no way to go wrong!
Happiness, joy, excitement, optimism all spring from a sense of hope. However, in our culture, there seems to be a lack of hope and an abundance of nihilism.
Nihilism, the belief that everything is meaningless, is used to justify doing whatever one pleases. This certainly has consequences. There are both worldly consequences that result from breaking the law, as well as a strong sense of guilt and regret.
I believe regret is the worst emotion experienced by humans. In my opinion, there is nothing causing more mental anguish than looking back on a moment and desperately wishing you had done things differently. Of course, changing the past is impossible.
The worst part is that you now have to learn to move on regardless.
On the flip side, going back to the sister’s argument, relief is an incredible emotion. It is the most satisfying, most beautiful and most exhilarating feeling. As the inevitable stresses of life pile up, a sigh of relief removes a weight off your shoulders in an instant.
Imagine you hear that an accident has happened and your loved one was on the scene. He or she may be injured or worse. You wait for hours, agonizing over potential bad news while also hoping for the best. Hoping, in this context, does nothing. It’s a wish. As you sit in your living room, tears in your eyes, you get a call. You pick it up slowly, dreading to hear the worst. But you don’t. The caller tells you your loved one is all right and miraculously uninjured. Your whole body relaxes at once.
That’s the beauty of relief. It is both a mental and physical experience. No other emotion compares.
Don’t be mistaken; hope is also a wonderful emotion, but I believe the emotion we crave the most is relief. The reason is that there are two different kinds of hope. The first version is hope without a precursor. This is “positivity” without a concrete reason. Optimism is both necessary and virtuous, and the hope that things will get better in a difficult situation is crucial to happiness and even survival.
Then there is the second kind of hope. This version is bestowed upon you by an external circumstance. In this case, only when an outcome has occurred that causes you relief, can you begin to hope for a better future.
The interplay of hope and relief return to the theme of the meaning of life.
Challenges and setbacks are an inevitable part of existence, and persisting in the face of these hardships is just part of “playing the game.” It is imperative you never give up. But when you persevere through a conflict, staying optimistic, you eventually come out on the other side. At the end of the struggle, the reward awaiting you is relief.
This is the gateway to lasting hope and confidence for the future.
