On My Soapbox: T’was some time before Christmas

T’was some time before Christmas and all through the house, decorations and lights were scattered about.

School was out for some reason, so children were home. To help pull out boxes with snowmen, Santas and gnomes.

Children 9 and under thought, “oh, what day,” not knowing that hours would be burning away.

Not having fun was the teenager by the door, who thought, “this is not fun, it’s more like a chore.”

“What was that boy?” his mother yelled about.

“Nothing, mom. Just getting this box then coming out.”

Outside dad is on the ladder stringing up the lights.

Since we’re in Texas he swats mosquitoes to avoid any bites.

He finishes the strand and off the ladder he would book it, but mom tells him, “wait, those lights are kind of crooked.”

He ascends once more to adjust the way that she likes.

Then mom decides green strands just don’t work and would rather use the white.

Children’s faces are astonished as their father begins to yell.

The teenager whispers, “I didn’t even know there was a cuss word that started with L.”

Things start to look better as time continues to elapse.

The youngest child still smiling, the teenager is ready to collapse.

Dad says, “Dear are we about finished? There’s a game I want to watch.”

Mom replies, “we’re almost done now, we simply cannot stop.”

The sun has become the moon and the light is now dusk.

No one has eaten since breakfast, they worked straight through lunch.

Now the front yard is complete and the outside looks the best.

Once they open the front door, the decorations are still a mess.

Dad exclaims, “I’m done. Y’all got it from here.”

The teenager slumps over, the youngest child starts to cheer.

Shoeboxes and H-E-B crates that they don’t even make anymore are filled with 20-year old lights, ornaments and decor.

The tree stands tall, all naked and bare.

You get pricks from the pines when you bend the limbs in the air.

You look for ornaments with hooks to hang on the tree.

Of the 40 you’ve dug through, you only found three.

Finally, its finished and everything seems done.

They even added the train with the same batteries from 2001.

The stockings are hung and house looks amazing.

What seems like two weeks was actually 17 hours. That’s just crazy.

What’s worse than that? When the kids begin to clean, the teenage finds a box marked “Halloween.”

He asks, “mom what’s this box, and why is it in my room?”

She says, “Your costumes because Halloween will be here pretty soon.”

“Mom! It’s Oct. 1,” the teenager whelps.

Mom replies, “do what I said before I go get my belt.”

This ends our tale of early decorating madness.

To some this is fun; to others it’s sadness.

This is story that I tell is nothing like my life.

It’s not about my childhood, my kids or my wife.

This was just something special for our Christmas edition.

If you enjoyed this little tale, then I’ve achieved my mission.

Now off of my soapbox, I think the Spurs play tonight.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

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